Phil's Bike Tour

Sunday, July 10, 2005

Viva la Gangbang

You party as long as you can, then you drink on the train on the way back home watching your friends trackstand on a moving subway while you borrow someone's Triple Antibiotic Ointment (thanks Austin) and then you go home and there are people still parting. What's that Rick James said, "Cocaine is a hell of a drug."

I retort: meh

Doyle and BLBC crew are up. So it makes since that I not sleep. I should go to Wolf Camera, but im stalled a bit by inaccess to computers. what suck is this? the internet is responsible for my tardiness? I repeat: meh

So my camycam is still broken, worse its sill just hanging out at the chicken hut, the miniDV tray refusing to close. It will take weeks to repair and since i am heading South for some unknown ammount of time I'd like to have it in the shop now rather than just before i board a plane back to Cascadia.

20 min after leaving the Chicken Hut I give up on delivering the cam cause I need to catch a Chinatown Bus soon, nevermind my natural tendicy to get lost when i know where im going. Sure enough I am way deeper in Brooklyn than i need to be to cross the Manhattan Bridge. The Chinatown Bus pulls off just as i roll up. Lucky for me there are 20-30 other passengers who are also stranded in Chinatown. So they are getting us another bus. We only wait a couple hours!

I spy a biker with all the messenger trimmings: chain around waist, track bike (fixed gearing w/ out handbrake... actually that describes a lot of bikers in this town, so nevermend) sure enough, Nick is going to Baltimore for the gangbang as well, and also has never taken said bus before.

We get dropped off in the middle of nowhere, that is to say we are now in Baltimore. There is a pitch of grass on the embankment next to the turnout from the freeway. About a quarter mile away I see some other more established bus lines have a building which could have a bathroom or phone I suppose. Austin and I use our powers of deduction and head into what we assume is the city center. Originally we were going to be so early we had planned on getting a bottle and finding a park, now they actually have their tables set up for registration only about an hour late, practically early according to BikeTime.

My knee is still swollen though. Ever since i crashed on Chris from TeamSpider's couch its been more fluid than meat. I keep on expecting to hear gushing noises every time i pedal. And it's my "good" knee. wasupwitthat? It's a team race and I can't put myself on a team cause I think i might not even be able to finish so I decide to save my dollabills for booze and just document what I can. Good thing too, biking around the core of the city was fun, but after a half hour I needed to flush out the fluids building in my joins.

"Across from the Hustler Club, next door to the Original Chicken Palace, is another 'chicken-based-palace-hut-thing'. Go though that alleyway past the video game arcade and in the back in a liquor store"

So I puck up some knee lube and OJ and head for the municipal buildings. they often are deserted early, have nice accommodations, and though are often patrolled by cops the pepper aren't gonna blink at some dirty biker drinking juice at cityhall.

A brother on a bike that I recognize from earlier rolls up and cops a squat on the bench next to me. He is messed up. Permanently. Burns, scars, sores, tweaked bones... still on a bike. So I share some juice and hear his story. His voice sounds like dried leaves in a food processor

"Im the devil's own."
"so your evil."
"i been bad"
"do you repent?"
"aint no savin me, every night i sleep with the devil"
"maybe you should check out the classified section"

Back at the party I keep on meeting folks from Washington, D.C. who want to buy me beer. Now I have a half drunk jug of vodka on my person, but who am i to turn beer down? Lot's of friendlies around including Harper, who was in Seattle and has since made a fresh start on the east coast.

"I've been given the responsibility of starting up a deadbaby outpost in DC"
"let's make some bikes!"
"I need a welder"
"naw, the design and engineering is more important. you can build choppers sans welds"
"give me a ring when your in DC"

Then I got distracted by a girl working a swag table in the party-lot (only a few trucks used for hauling things had parked there). Ginny is responsible for the styles out of Riot Apparel. Nice gal she had some dope shirts and a cute smile. But then after making nice for a few min I got distracted by some video action going on.

Dual projectors are set up. One has goldsprint info on it showing the relative position of the riders. (Goldsprints = 4 stationary bikes for racing a short distance... basically spinning out for 35 seconds, it's painfully annoying to participate but watching is kinda entertaining and makes for a better background than stupid 2 dimensional video crap. Of course these are the same guys who told me to put my clothes on or get out last time we had Goldsprints).

The other projector IS video crap, so I rush on over and talk some shop. Local cable access guy wants more bike videos. You dont say... No audio and the video breaks up cause the DVD has been though over 1000 miles in my bag. but still some of it looks good.

Then I get distracted by an alleyway. That is where I wake up several hours later. Almost everyone is gone. I call my contact from earlier who was actually excited to have me stay... Yeah, he's not answering.

But luckily I had met Stewy from Philly, who was going to a friend's place with 4 other guys. Aaron was super cool about us taking over his floor space and bought flat of Yingling beer to add to the mostly full handle of vodka I had.

Someone showed up with a burger that had 4 different kind of animals in it: pork, bacon, sausage, and ham... with an egg! delicious.

Man we had a great time in that space. Watched some videos, this time with sound. Hella entertainment. Stewy plays polo in Baltimore on Wednesdays. Aaron knows of the zoobomb and feels like he wants to help spread the word of the F.U.N. movement. B-Timor, Murderland could be next on the minibike circuit.

http://www.messengers.org/events/events2005/2005.07.09.baltimore.jpg
http://www.riotapparel.com/

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